For Aden

Originally I wanted this post to be about Zahratul Iman and my journey to Pahang but I'm not feeling it rn. I'll put that one up later, right after this post.

It hurts me that you're also hurt, the way I did.

I guess nice people like us is easy to be left kot? Maybe we seem so heartless, we look as if we're not gonna break. Maybe we're too cute we look like dolls so orang boleh campak buang. Hahaha.

But I still think nice people like you, at least, deserved to be loved properly, by a person who knows how to appreciate you, by a person who knows how to stay down with you.

God I'm so mad. I'm so mad for you. I'm so mad at the person who ruined your hard-to-gain trust. I'm so mad at that girl, too. I'm mad at everyone!

Moving on wouldn't be easy, for sure. It took me almost a year to get over Ziq, and right now it still kinda smarts when I see him posting stuff with his new girl. But we gotta learn to let go of shit doh. Berak kot. Tahi. Sampah. Buang dia cemana dia buang kau. I'll be here. I'll be here for you to meroyan. I'll be here, nak kutuk nak mengumpat nak nangis. I'm here. I can't make the pain go away, but I'll try my best to make you forget it for a second.

And I know you're losing sleep, you're losing the will to eat. Manfaatkan masa ni untuk jadi kurus hahahaha. But just don't lose yourself over a guy that's not worth it, ok? You just deserve better, sebabtu Allah takdirkan mamat tu blah dengan cara macamtu, so that you'll have a reason to hate him walaupun aku tahu seburuk mana pun cara dia tinggalkan kau, you still like him. Hahah. I have that problem too.

Let's just laugh it off, okay? Sumpah lahh aku memang paling pantang lah orang mintak break off sebab nak insaf la kepala bana lepastu pergi kejar perempuan lain hahahaha pak kau. Pergi mampos jela cepat cepat. Kelakar nak mati perangai dia.

Dah. Be mad at him. Jangan lembut hati dengan orang macamtu. Hahahaha aku pun sebenarnya lembut hati dengan Ziq hahahaha but know your limits. You'll always have a soft spot for a wrong person and we can't stop that. Yang kita boleh buat is to restrain ourselves. Tell yourself that nothing is going to be alright with a person who jumps around macamtu. Tell yourself it's not your loss, it's his. Tell yourself that you're better off without him (which is true) and come on, be a lion. Bodohnya be a lion hahah i was gonna say be brave, stand tall tapi cam sama dengan lion kan so ok la tu hahahaha.

Remember, I'm here for you. No matter how rough it is, I'm here. Ok?